theclearlydope:

Guess she didn’t get an iPhone either.

theclearlydope:

Damnnnn girl I just got lost in your eyes. No seriously, I just lost the last twenty minutes in your eyes. I have no idea what happened but I’m in a coffee shop and I’m missing a shirt and a sock.  …. Oh there’s the sock. 

theclearlydope:

I want you to stay at least 10 feet away from my food at all time.

theclearlydope:

You won’t like me when I’m sweaty.

theclearlydope:

Balance could be an issue.

hothotjapanhot:

More Jordan Carver doing Yoga. Honestly, this could be a spectator sport.

theclearlydope:

On December 26th we pee on Santa’s beard.

theclearlydope:

A. I hope Boba Fett is driving.

B. I hope they’re being chased by the LAPD.

C. Can I borrow your truck Jabba? I’m moving this weekend.

theclearlydope:

I’m about to go holiday shopping. This year when I enter a store I will be using the prison technique of hitting the first person I see to let them know … I’M NOT AFRAID. 

theclearlydope:

The three wise men brought spinach artichoke dip and a case of Miller High LIfe talls.

theclearlydope:

Hello Good Morning Internet: A lesson will be learned here today.